


Whoopsie daisie

by WitchJanus_Rights



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: AAAaaaaAAAAAAaaaAA, Autistic Janus, Everyone is suffering, GIVE JANUS RIGHTS 2020, Janus just wants rights, Mental Breakdown, Yellow kinda sus, autistic meltdown kinda, fortnite suxxxxxxxx, gonna play some Minecraft, k bye lol, logan needs help, wrote this in whim, yay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-18
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:09:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,650
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27088396
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WitchJanus_Rights/pseuds/WitchJanus_Rights
Summary: Janus has a emotional breakdown, while trying to make the patreon. And Logan is LoSiNG hIs MaRbLeS
Kudos: 17





	Whoopsie daisie

**Author's Note:**

> Janus wants rights. Good day sir

How had he not seen it coming? Of course the others hadn’t really accepted him yet. Even Virgil- who he had raised- was still calling him by his title- Deceit. And it annoyed him more than anything. The only one who was decent enough to call him by his name was Remus. And it wasn’t like Virgil didn’t know his name. No, Virgil knew well his name was Janus. So maybe it might take some time. He could wait. He could wait to feel respected and appreciated. Treated like an actual side and not like some scary legend come to life. He was sick of them all still acting surprised whenever he showed up. Like he was some evil bad guy Who lurked In the shadows. But he wasn’t. He was just trying to do his job. Help Thomas in the best way he could. And yet they never thanked him in the slightest. Fine. Let them think he was some monster. Let them think he was bad. That he would make Thomas bad. He didn’t care. It’s not like he wanted to be accepted. Wanted to be part of the group. He definitely didn’t miss Virgil. And definitely wasn’t jealous that his son had moved on and found someone else. Definitely not…..  
Janus was plagued by these thoughts as he sat in the office of the mind palace. After Thomas had agreed to let him run the Patreon, Logan had been kind enough to let him use his office. Janus’s back in the sub conscious wasn’t as nice. Or as clean. In fact he hadn’t used it in awhile, not really needing to. He was never asked for help. And never acknowledged. Until now. It had taken some time, but he could tell Thomas was warming up to him. At least the host of all people didn’t seem to think he was all bad, and was accepting enough to use his real name. Patton had been ruled out of the running because he was a push over. Logan was too stiff. Roman was just, well it was Roman. Janus particularly didn’t like him. And Remus well, Remus had volunteered but the others had immediately shot him down. And Janus had tried to help, but Remus had already gone off to do Remus things. So Janus was already ticked at the others. His hopes of this being a step closer to acceptance dwindled slightly when Roman and Virgil had returned from following Thomas around the mall. He had heard everything. Thomas doesn’t want you. He wants nothing to do with you. Janus stared at the blank computer screen. It had sat like that for the past half hour. He had stared at the patreon set up for an hour, spacing out before finally turning the machine off. So much time had gone by and yet he could barely do anything. His mind clouding over with things he didn’t want to think about.  
They’ll never accept you. They’ll never accept Remus. Virgil will never come home. He’s gone. He wants nothing to do with you. Patton’s a better father-  
There was a clang as he slammed his fist on the table, his hot chocolate threatening to spill. There was a knock on the door and he froze.  
“Janus?” It was Logan. Janus quickly booted the computer back up as he heard the knob turn. The login screen popped up as the logical side opened the door. And he quickly tried to type the password in, only to get it wrong.  
“Is everything okay?” Logan asked, looking around.  
“Everything is perfectly fine,” Janus said, turning to Logan. Logan looked at the computer screen and frowned.  
“Are you done already?”  
Janus gave a half hearted chuckle.  
“Of course, why wouldn’t I be?”  
The logical sides frown deepened as he stepped forward.  
“You’re lying,” he pointed out, adjusting his glasses. Janus shoved his hands in his pockets as he asked “why on earth would you say that?” Then kicked himself. He was deceit after all. That was his job. Logan walked over and pulled another chair over.  
“You appear to have typed the password I gave you incorrectly,” he said, then pulled the keyboard towards him. The deceitful side watched as the other logged him back into the computer.  
“You have done quite a bit so far. A break is quite understandable.”  
Janus blinked.  
“Why would you care if I didn’t take a break?”  
Logan passed the keyboard back to him.  
“Overworking ones self if quite inefficient. Normal breaks are required to complete a task correctly. You locked yourself in here for hours, Janus.”  
“I’m not over working myself,” he said, and then cringed. Logan could see through his lies. Logic always saw through deceit.  
Logan sighed and suddenly looked concerned.  
“What’s going on, Janus? You’ve been acting weird lately, especially since Roman and Virgil returned from the mall.”  
“Why Logan, Ive just been working more, and wanting to make this as good as it can be. Besides, that trip to the mall didn’t bother me at all.” He clamped his gloved hands over his mouth. He had to stop. Wasn’t he supposed to be good at lying?  
Logan clicked the computer off and fixed his tie.  
“I know I’m not Patton, or Roman-“  
“Oh thank god you’re not! Those two are unbearable,” Janus said, frustrated.  
Logan seemed taken aback.  
“Tha wasn’t a lie,”  
“Not everything I say is a lie!” Janus snapped, then trained his eyes on the floor. He didn’t want to be here. Being stared at by Logan. The only light side who seemed to somewhat accept him. Who was probably regretting it right now. He wanted to be back in the sub conscious watching Sesame Street with Remus. It was silent for a few minutes, until finally Logan spoke.  
“I can tell you are not okay, and as a cowor- friend, I am concerned.”  
Janus refused to look up at him. He wasn’t going to tell Logan anything. He couldn’t help but distrust all the light sides. Trust couldn’t be built, especially after everything that had happened.  
“Janus, please, just talk to me. Then I’ll leave you alone.”  
He begudgedly sat up fully and looked at Logan. Logan May give off the idea that he had no emotions. But Janus could see it. He could see how deep Logan’s concern ran as he looked into the logical sides eyes. He was obviously lying to himself and everyone else about being stoic and emotionless. And he would break one day. Janus wasn’t sure if it would be for better or worse.  
He quickly trained his eyes on the wall behind Logan, not wanting to retain eye contact anymore.  
“I am not okay, In fact, I am not bothered at all by the outcome of the mall. I am especially not hurt by the fact that your the only one here who will actually use my name.”  
There was a moment of silence. Janus looked back down at the floor as he waited for Logan’s response. It took Logan a minute to process and come up with something to say.  
“You’re upset I’m the only one using your name and feel like everyone else here doesn’t want you.”  
“No,” Janus replied weakly. He wanted to run. He couldn’t break down now. Not in front of Logan. No. He couldn’t show weakness anymore than he already had. He jerked his seat back as he noticed Logan’s hand on his leg. He hissed and wrapped his arms around himself. His legs now crisscrossed. The logical side seemed startled, and a little surprised.  
“I’m sorry,” he said quickly.  
Janus didn’t respond, only glared.  
“I just- I didn’t mean to make you upset. I should’ve realize you wouldn’t respond well to human contact.”  
“Good job, no wonder you’re the smart one,” Janus said sarcastically, trying to regain his composure. He then quickly realized how awful that sounded. This wasn’t Logan’s fault. At least he was trying. Unlike morality who seemed to only be nice to Janus in front of the others, then turn into a manipulative lizard the next minute.  
“I’m sorry,” he said, wincing. It was the truth. And telling the truth was quite difficult for the snake. Especially when he was in a bad place.  
“It’s okay, I understand.”  
The two sat there in silence for awhile. Neither knowing what to say.  
He’s definitely not judging you. Janus wasn’t sure what to do. He felt trapped. He wanted to run away. Back to the subconscious where he belonged. Who was he kidding? He couldn’t do this. He couldn’t handle this. Where had he come up with the idiotic idea that he could actually be accepted and work with the others?  
“Your hot cocoa seems cold,” Logan notes quietly.  
“No good to me now,” Janus sighed and then got up.  
“I think I will go take a break,”  
“That is a good idea,” Logan said also getting up. Janus started for the door before Logan stopped him.  
“I know the others can be…difficult to deal with. But- whatever bad blood we have between us, Janus, I am sorry.”  
Janus turned to look back at logic. His glasses seemed a little misted over.  
“The feeling is…mutual,” the lying side said, sincerely.  
Logan nodded.  
“I would rather not be bothered for a bit- so if you could tell the others not to do something stupid- thst would be nice.”  
“I can do that- thought stupidity sometimes runs rampant here.”  
The snake let himself grin.  
“Oh I know the feeling all too well,” then he left the room. Those dams would break. And once they did, a storm would come. And Janus was left with that awful thought as he retreated to the subconscious, and threw himself onto the couch next to Remus, putting on a episode of Sesame Street. Because the storm was not today.

**Author's Note:**

> Tekkkknologie SIr


End file.
